It’s really kind of the season for goals and planning and reflection over the past year, right? So maybe that’s why I did two goal posts back to back.
The truth is… This is what’s on my mind right now. This is a big part of why I don’t get a lot of writing done in December. I take that hit because it’s important to know where you’re going and the why of it.
After my two-year writing hiatus, I came back in 2017 ready to pick up where I left off. But I didn’t expect that it would take another six to eight months to get back into the swing of things. It never occurred to me. I thought I would come back and everything would be as it was. But that wasn’t true. I had trouble writing. I didn’t know what to write, really. I wasn’t in a place where I could produce another Lucky Thirteen book. So at the end of 2017, I really hadn’t done much except getting myself back into writing. I wasn’t writing anything for publication. It was just for me.
It’s been a weird year. I’d say… it was a rebuilding year. I did a lot of rebuilding in 2017, but most of that was the foundation, like getting my website back online, and migrating my mailing list to a different service so I could have more functionality. I got into drawing and painting, and oddly enough, that new hobby got me into the writing mood more than anything else did.
2018 was about fine-tuning the new foundation and getting the writing done. The first book I finished in three years was HIS LAST BREATH. It took me most of 2018. I restarted it from what I had of it from before. It still wasn’t working. So I rewrote it in a different POV (third instead of first person) and it gelled. I wrote the zero draft in about three weeks. Revisions took about two months. After that, it was edits and cover art and doing all the businessy things like picking a release date.
December may have not been the best month to release with all the holiday books and stuff out from the big publishers, but I really needed to have something out before the end of the year, so I could feel like I did something, even though I know inside that I did a ton this year, more than I did in 2017 and definitely more than in 2016.
Now I know I can do it.
The last few years, I’ve looked back on the past year and felt like it was the worst year ever. There were various reasons for it. My sister passed, I lost my crappy Day Job, I had money struggles after someone else screwed me over and stole a shit ton of money from me. So my reasons are probably valid.
This year, I don’t feel like that. I don’t feel like this heavy cloud is sitting on me like it has been the last few years. I have a pretty good Day Job, even though I call it the Sucky Day Job. I really only call it that because I’d rather stay home and write. Can’t blame me for that. My kids are awesome and smart and talented and they’re doing so well. And I’m writing again. I’m talking to people outside my family. I’m really starting to enjoy life and writing again.
So there you have it. My 2018 wrap up. 2019 is going to be even better. I’ve always thought that struggling makes you appreciate the good times even more. Maybe I still struggle sometimes, but on the whole, I’m on the upswing in my life. If I could, I’d freeze myself at the very top, and never come down again.